HOW TO GET A RAISE

Excuse me sir, may I talk to you?

Sure, come on in. What can I do for you?

Well sir, as you know, I have been an employee of this prestigious firm for over ten years.

Yes.

I won't beat around the bush. sir, I would like a raise. I currently have four companies after me and so I decided to talk to you first.

A raise? I would love to give you a raise, but this is just not the right time.

I understand your position, and I know that the current economic downturn has had a negative impact on sales, but you must also take into consideration my hard work, pro-activeness and loyalty to this
company for over a decade.

Taking into account these factors, and considering I don't want to start a brain drain, I'm willing to offer you a ten percent raise and an extra five days of vacation time. How does that sound?

Great! It's a deal! Thank you, sir!

Before you go, just out of curiosity: what companies are after you?

Oh - the electric company, gas company, water company and the mortgage company!