A man walked into a restaurant he'd never been to before. The waiter came and asked him for his order.

Feeling lonely, he replied, "Meat loaf and a kind word."

When the waiter returned with the meat loaf, the man said, "Where's the kind word?"

The waiter put down the meat loaf, sighed, bent down and whispered, "Don't eat the meat loaf."

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I said to the doctor "I have this ringing in my ears."

He said, "Don't answer it!"